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Syurgeon Moon



Tomorrow will be a full moon, the Sturgeon moon.

I have spent the day going through all the paper remnants of the time of Bianca.

I have been feeling a ritual coming on and this is how it will be.

I have dug a hole into the rocky east bay hill side where David and I have lived for the past 2 years.

When I stand there, I can see into the city where Bianca was when she died.

I have candles burning and I have cut into strips the sweet letters you wrote, journal entry’s from the memorial and first year of grieving, among other memories of her life and leaving.

I have wrapped the tiny pieces in an old well loved dress of hers that I wore until it fell apart, making small bundles. Tomorrow morning I will bury them in the fullness of the moon with the fullness of my heart.

Yet another piece of letting go.


On The Road

The fog has just rolled in, here in El Cerrito, CA

I am heading to the Sonoran Desert for friends, family, Chanteling and a house concert.

The car is packed, the moon is almost full. Time to drive.


Dear friends and family

The longest night of the year has passed and the New Year is close.


I write to let you know that by the end February David and I will be on the west coast.

David has been offered a job in Emeryville, California.


We are packing, downsizing yet again. Neither of us had ever thought of living in California, yet when we asked for the Highest and Best for the both of us, this is what came up.

A big plus is being so close to my sweet sister, and some very dear friends.

So here we go off on our next adventure. To the BIG city.


May your year be filled with light and love


Cantrell and David


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This weekend’s adventure was going to Mt Evans. 14,000 feet and a view to take away my breath, never mind that I can hardly breathe at that altitude. OK OK so most of it was driving, But I must say the road is not for the weak of heart. And we kept passing people on bicycles! Even a group riding Denver’s rent a bikes with stuffed animals and a bowling ball in the baskets. After we walked up to the summit we drove down to Summit Lake and had another hike towards Chicago lakes. Another drive down took us to Mt Goliath and an amazing forest of Bristlecone Pines. David got to hang with Smokey the bear on Smokey’s 70th BD. Meanwhile this seasons torrential rains and lighting storms followed us down the mountain.We found a great new restaurant in Golden with Venezuelan food called Elote’s café, restaurant and Bar. Wonderful dinner to end a glorious day.

A meadow

712 a place for lunch

712 Elkweed

712 field flowers wild

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712 Frazer Meadow

712 hiking into the clouds

712 indian paintbrush

This last weekend we stopped in Golden for a farmers market visit on our way to an all day hike in Golden state Park. The wildflowers were amazing as we hiked up through the clouds and arrived at Fraiser Meadow. We spent the evening and the next morning with David’s Father tying Flies for fishing. All in all another wonderful weekend in this beautiful state.


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David and I have been having adventures.

This last weekend we went south on 25. At Walsenburg we took a county road along a creek to La Veta. Drove by skeletons of some old town in the shadow of the Spanish Peaks. The native peoples called the peaks, the breasts of the world. Looked for and hiked up through the Great Dikes of the Spanish Peaks. The great Dikes are a geological world wonder.,

Out of Cuchura, we ate lunch with big ants in a forest of oak which became aspen. So many wildflowers this year and it continues to rain. After a few hours hiking switchbacks we continued driving south on 12. Checked out Blue lake on the east slope of the Sangre De Cristo Mountains and had a picnic dinner next to the rushing Cucharas river. Driving south we continued past small lakes, coal mines and ranching communities, along the beautiful Purgatoire river, stopping along the way to check out future fishing and hunting possibilities. Spent the night in Trinidad, a depressed border town made mostly, and not surprisingly of red brick. Just north of town we saw the old domed brick ovens.

Saturday we took 25 north turned right at Walsenburg, 160 to Alamosa, 285 south to Antonio and 17 west into the Rio Grande Forest and the South San Juan Wilderness. Fished Elk Creek, David pulled in one brook trout. Followed 250 along a fairly bad road for 3 hours along the Conejos River, so happy so beautiful. Fishes some more, never finding out what the fish wanted to eat. Once we got over Stunner pass we began following the Alamosa River which we found out was highly acidic, caused by mining and the natural geology. By early evening we were almost back up Alamosa way, driving through flat open irrigated farmland and Amish.

This is where you do not eat in Alamosa. First hint no one in the restaurant, dirty menus and stale chips. David asks for a small cup of the red and green chili. The green is not green and the red is not red and they both taste like watered down floured gravy, we give the bewildered waitress a few bucks and leave. We ended up with some good tacos around the corner.

Straight up 17 north an hour away was Joyful Journey Hot Springs, where we had a room and 110 degree hot water in pools looking east at the Sangre De Christo mountains. We soaked a long day of fishing and driving away watching the sky start to rest and the night hawk’s mating dance.